I Believe – My Values

Taylor’s Middle School Basketball Miracle

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December 8, 2017

This week was Taylor’s last week of 8th grade basketball. After winning two games all year, both against non-league Leavenworth school Patton early in the season, we had the KVL post season tournament. Of the 8 teams, we were last because we didn’t beat any league teams during the year. Taylor was really the only player with any basketball experience, and we were super proud of her ability to get teammates involved – Taylor has a natural ability to see people before they are open, and often times we go from ‘having no chance to score’ to at least having an opportunity to score because of where Taylor passes it. Unfortunately most of the time the recipient has problems even catching the ball, but that doesn’t stop Taylor from her efforts to make the right play. Erin and I spent most of the season pleading for Taylor to shoot more – or at least be ready to drive/shoot those times you get the ball back in the flow of the offense..which most of the time means throw it to the wing, and back to Taylor, ha!

We lost the first two games of the league tournament but actually played well against the #1 seed. There were some good signs of effort that we haven’t seen consistently in some of the games we may have competed more.

Well the last game of the season, against Clark Middle School (Bonner) for 7th place in the league – or ‘not last’ – we started out the game not catching a break. There was only one referee and he was closer to 80 years old, and while he had great spirit, he missed two unforced turnovers on Clark that ended up turning into 4 points in the first quarter. We were down from the start, and Erin and I were frustrated Taylor didn’t try to score more—although she did have several good drives that we thought she was fouled on, but no call, and no finish on those attempts. Taylor did score 2 in the first half and had a super fun assist at the buzzer of the first quarter when she passed to Abby on the block who finished. I believe we were down 4-8 after the first quarter, and then 6-14 at halftime. Giving up 14 points and expecting to win is about our limit over the course of the season, as our offense struggles to score, so it was dire at halftime.  The third quarter had several ‘in and out’ shots from us and it was an offensive struggle with LTMS scoring a free throw as the only scoring of the quarter. LTMS 7, Clark 14.

Taylor was far more offensively aggressive in the 4Q. I believe early in the quarter she hit a jumper from near the free throw elbow, and then the next possession she got fouled on a shot and went to the free throw line and swished both free throws to get us within 3 points. I believe with under 2 minutes left she found herself open at the top of the key and banked in a 3 pointer to tie the game!! It was so exciting to ‘have a chance’.  Clark ended up getting fouled on the next possession and made both free throws for their only points in the second half. Taylor came down and shot the ball to tie the game, but it rimmed out, and we got the rebound and scored to tie the game. We played strong defense and ended up going to overtime.

After a few back/forth exchanges without scoring, Clark was trying to apply a lot of pressure to Taylor, but she used a screen on the right side of the court and drive past her defender on the baseline and swished the go-ahead basket with about a minute left in overtime! We held them scoreless and got a put back to go up 20-16 and we held on for the improbable victory! The girls went crazy and I believe it was our first league win in about 3 years. What a finish! Taylor had 11 of the 20 points.

A mom from Clear Creek/MTMS (Lauren Payne’s mom) commented how super impressed she was with Taylor’s attitude and effort playing with so many girls that haven’t ever played before. That she’s so encouraging and helpful and positive. I will say Taylor’s attitude was much better than her parents in the stands 😉 – what a way to finish the season.

****Erin’s FB post

Middle school basketball is a wrap. So proud of the way these girls have worked all season to get better. They were down 6-14 at half to a team that already beat them twice and came back with a big 20-16 overtime win. Taylor hit a huge 3 to tie late in the 4th and scored in overtime to take the lead. Way to go LT Panthers!

This Is Us

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In my 5th grade Social Studies class, Mrs. Mueller decided to immerse the class into understanding the American political process as a class project. She divided our class into two groups that she labeled ‘Conservatives’ and ‘Liberals’, and I’m convinced none of us knew the meaning behind either label. Upon first glance, I instantly found myself excited for the classmates and friends in my group, including my very best friend, Colton Walle. Each group was instructed to work within the ’party’ to identify a presidential nominee, and I was selected to represent the party.  Mrs. Mueller then said that the nominee was to name a running mate for the upcoming mock election that would encompass the entire 5th grade. The conservatives identified Georgie Porter as the nominee and he chose Jes Condray to join him. I remember having very little time to make a decision among the approximately 12 people in my party, and it was a no-brained to choose Colton…however, at the last minute I changed my mind and selected Erin Willoughby, in hopes of securing the female votes in the election.

That decision paid off, as I remember the victory as 59-3 in our favor. The very next recess, I remember riding the political high from the secured victory and I approached my vice presidential running mate with a wave of nerves near the basketball court, and I ultimately asked her ‘Will you go with me?”  This was a significant moment in my life. THE FIRST TIME I built up courage to ask a girl in person! Until this moment, the practice I was most comfortable with was passing notes/circling yes-no….But I had done it. Asked the question. Only to realize that I didn’t get an answer as quickly as I was expecting. The delay seemed to be an eternity, but realizing the weight of what I had just done, I saved myself AND Erin by saying ‘Don’t worry about it’, retracting my offer before the inevitable rejection that would have followed.

Just 4 years later, as my family was moving from Brentwood, Tennessee to Brenton, Alabama, my parents — presumably due to a level of guilt for moving our family once more — allowed Ty and I to attend the last 6 weeks of school in Minneapolis, Kansas, and live with my grandparents Ken and Darda.  It did not take me long to reconnect with Colton, and I remember specifically asking him what the girl landscape was at the high school. He told me he knew one girl liked me, but I was more interested in Erin.

We spent some time together in groups of friends, including several ping-pong matches with Jes Condray and Angie Rupert. But I do remember one occasion where several of us played some version of hide and seek on the golf course at dark. My crush continued. It took 5 years later for the story to continue.

In November of 1996 my roommate, Corey, told me someone left a message. He said ‘Aaron called’. That’s how I heard it anyway. When I saw he had listed a 913 area code, I knew…Erin! I called her back and we spent some time catching up, and I learned that Erin asked my grandma, Darda, how I was doing and grandma told her to call me and find out, giving her my number. Erin and I exchanged e-mail addresses and continued to stay in touch over the next few months. In March, I decided it was time to “visit my grandma” back in Kansas over spring break instead of all my other options afforded me.

Erin turned down an opportunity to go to Colorado that week

**drove/stopped in Manhattan, went out to eat….assume I stayed with Colton??

**Only saw each other essentially 2-3 days of the week.  Also suffered worst loss in KU history (to Arizona) https://www.sports-reference.com/cbb/boxscores/1997-03-21-arizona.html

The night before I left back to Bama / first kiss —

Neither of us address whether or not we were dating, but definitely continued to deepen our friendship as I was grateful to establish an opportunity to work for my uncle Mike in Salina later that summer.

**after the summer, went back to work again in Salina during the 6 week break I had between Thanksgiving and New Years. That’s probably the time we both knew.

For Spring Break in 1998, I flew Erin down and picked her up in Atlanta, and we ??drove to Troy briefly? and then to Brewton. The next day (Saturday, March 21, 1998) we drove to Ft. Walton/Destin Florida.  I lead Erin towards a walk on the beach as sunset approached, on Ft. Walton Public Beach Access #5…the scenery was beautiful. We walked along the beach holding hands through the refreshing gulf breeze, watching seagulls pass by.

I cannot remember the words I began to ramble, but the spirit of what I told Erin is that she had injected supreme joy in my life over the previous year, and that I had never been happier. My best friend, and someone I was ready to spend the rest of my life with.  At that point I got down with one knee in the sand, opened a jewelry case exposing a diamond ring, and said “Erin Willoughby, will you marry me?”

It was a complete surprise to Erin, and she froze in shock. I had spent the past 3 months thinking about and preparing for this moment, and she was absorbing it all in about 10 seconds of being speechless.  Surely, as I was waiting, many of those same feelings as a 5th grader afraid of rejection came flowing back to consciousness. But there was no retraction this time, the wait felt like an eternity. Erin collected herself and said ‘Yes’ and we hugged and kissed in joy. Erin was awestruck processing the situation as two 20 year olds committed the rest of their lives to one another. For the next several hours I remember Erin staring at her ring in shock. We went out to eat at a steakhouse nearby to celebrate, but couldn’t even purchase a drink!

Earlier that week, I called Randy and Linda to let them know my intentions of asking Erin to marry me. I know I worked myself up over this in anticipation of speaking to them because it felt like it was on the very early side of possibilities, and mostly impossibility, at that point in our relationship.  I remember I started with everyday chit chat, which was certainly odd over the phone while I was at school, and then worked myself into several compliments about Erin. When I finally spit it out that I had planned to ask Erin to marry me, Randy’s first comment was “Well, we’ve been expecting this for a while now.” That totally shocked me!

I was certainly excited about what was in store for us next. This was March, 1998, and I remember making a push to get married in August. In my mind I was already prepared to transfer to whatever city Erin would be attending Occupational Therapy School (Wichita or Kansas City). After I was awakened to all of the planning to be done, June 12, 1999, sure sounded like a strong date.

Of course I had already registered for Troy State Spring Quarter classes with an intent on transferring, so I had the scholarship minimum 12 hours of classes — one of them a repeat of a C I planned to bring up to an A, and an easy Art class.  I met with my counselor before the add/drop class date and realized that instead of transferring at the end of my sophomore year, I could load up and tackle the remaining classes I needed to graduate just 8 months later. He approved my taking 20 hours in the spring, 20 hours in the summer, and 22 hours in the fall of 1998. I graduated before Thanksgiving, and had a job lined up at the US District Court in Kansas City, Kansas, as a Systems Engineer ($32,000).

 

**never charged my phone bill until 2 weeks left/etc

BACK TO SCHOOL

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Today schoolbooks are supplied to students as a help to students and parents so as to help and encourage everybody to finish High School. That was not the case for me and my generation. Since I was born and raised in Aguascalientes, Ags. Mexico as I have already stated before, the free distribution of books in Schools did not happen during my time. As a Child I attended Catholic Schools. They were the best privet Schools in Mexico. They required a special School uniform; and did not offer anything free.

BACK TO SCHOOL

We had to attend the first mass of the day at 5:30 am at the Templo del Ave Maria otherwise we would get a suspension. The priest had to sign a card we were previously given at School. By the way, it had to be done every day.  Their monthly fees were very high. In those days the priests had a lot of influence on parents to take their kids to their schools. Well, I am giving you the background, so you know what it was like back then in the DARK AGES and for you to be thankful to the Lord for the gift of Salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ and to mention that one year when I was 9 years old, I was given the list for all the schoolbooks and materials for that year. As soon as my dad got home from work, I told him that I needed to get something for School. He told me that we could go get them after supper. I was used to him taking us out after supper to go to the Soda Fountain located in El Parian and enjoy a cold Choco Milk. and then buy few comics to practice my reading. So, I was used to him spending some money on us kids and that gave me the freedom to ask him to go to the Book Store. I gave the school list to the person behind the counter and suddenly, she brought a pile of books and School materials. I was very happy and excited to take all of that back home even if Dad didn’t take e to enjoy my cold Choco Milk. when my dad saw the bill, he almost fainted because the price for the books had gone up a lot and he didn’t have that much money. From there on I learned to tell him what I Really needed right away and what could wait. I really felt bad for him because I knew I had made him look bad. I still remember the Lady’s face when my dad told her he didn’t have all the money because I caused her to bring everything to the counter. I wish I could go back intime and fix it. Now I know that I need to think twice or more times before deciding on anything.

Chad

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Reserved for Chad’s story

 

Raw notes/email links:

Date: Mon, 2 Dec 2019 11:50:56 -0600
From: Ben Krehbiel <Ben@krehbiel.org>
Subject: Re: WhiteFlag: Tues@6:30a – Day of Thanksgiving
To: Chad Davis <davischad155@gmail.com>

Awesome awesome awesome.

Fantastic. Love the way God works. How wild is it that we pick your Tuesday a few weeks ago and cbs airs that story yesterday ahead of us.

DO NOT TEMPER YOUR FAITH— I’ve made this VERY INVITATIONAL and we may have some non believers joining us tomorrow. Do your thing baby. The spirit of WhiteFlag is non-threatening (and yet unapologetic), when it comes to our faith. Can’t wait. But I wanted to give you a heads up there may be some new folks there. While they may not believe, they have interest in our group and definitely your testimony. Thx brother for doing this!!!

On Dec 2, 2019, at 9:33 AM, Chad Davis <davischad155@gmail.com> wrote:
Whoa Ben!

Thanks for sharing this, this is the same bone disease that I have.

I’m humbled by this young man, I really don’t know what to say beyond that.

It’s kind of a mic drop when you put this with the two talks.  You get the who, how and why of my life!  What I hope to accomplish tomorrow is encourage others to connect their faith, and scars, to their Spiritual Gifts in order to be better equipped to share with others the message of hope to those that struggle in this world.

It takes us all to the next phases in our lives:  1) What’s in a (our) name and 2) Where do we go from here?

See you in the morning!

Chad

—– Forwarded message from Ben Krehbiel <Ben@krehbiel.org> —–
Date: Mon, 2 Dec 2019 07:00:39 -0600
From: Ben Krehbiel <Ben@krehbiel.org>
Subject: Reminder: WhiteFlag: Tuesday@6:30a  (Chad Davis leading — incredible adversity and faith message)

Guys- Just a reminder for tomorrow. We will discuss Chads two messages below and likely this related story that aired yesterday —

This CBS Sunday story was really good. About Shriners Hospitals spokesman Alec, who has a bone disease that he’s endured over 60 broken bones in his young 17 years of life. Pretty special spirit.
8 min video        https://www.cbsnews.com/news/alec-cabacungan-spokesperson-for-shriners-hospitals-for-children/
Ben
913.205.2511

From: ben@krehbiel.org <ben@krehbiel.org>
Sent: Friday, November 29, 2019 11:32 AM
Subject: WhiteFlag: Tuesday@6:30a (Chad Davis leading — incredible adversity and faith message)
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope you have a great weekend!

On Tuesday we will be lead by Chad Davis — who shares an amazing and inspirational story of his life. There are two short messages that will best equip you for the conversation Tuesday morning (but not required).

1) Faith  https://www.spreaker.com/user/10025143/12-30-18-lifebridge-faith-w-chad-davis  (direct MP3 download: https://api.spreaker.com/download/episode/16638200/12_30_18_lifebridge_faith_w_chad_davis.mp3 ) — starts at the 1:15 mark.
Chad shares his incredible story of adversity, having been born with a bone disease that lead to an astonishing ‘over 200’ broken bones suffered in his lifetime.I often think about what we are doing with our talents and gifts, and from my perspective…Chad is at the top of his game.

2) Scars  https://www.spreaker.com/user/10025143/6-2-19-lifebridge-leaving-bigfootprints- (direct MP3 download: https://api.spreaker.com/download/episode/18230637/6_2_19_lifebridge_leaving_bigfootprints_scars.mp3 ) — starts at the 2:35 mark.

If you have to arrive late or leave early, no worries! We will discuss these on Tuesday! Feel free to forward this onto a friend!
The coffee is on me this week 😉

On the fringe…

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Chapter dedicated to stories of WhiteFlag ‘on the fringe/outskirts’ of our impacts/etc.

****

(Ben-~August 2019) Guys—I’ve thought of you/WhiteFlag EVERY DAY this week and I have to share what happened Tuesday morning as we were closing. A young man, Jesse, beat us to one of the tables we use to join to the larger table each week before 6:30a. It felt a little odd to sit at our table because surely we were going to disrupt his space, as he had a laptop AND tablet laid out on that small table. I ignored a nudge to invite him and/or apologize for invading…and WhiteFlag discussion commenced. With about 5 minutes left we were wrapping up and I asked our group if anyone had anything they wanted to get off their chest. A few silent moments later, who we now know as Jesse chimed in and said “Guys, I just want you all to know what you guys are doing here is really inspiring. It’s great to see such genuine, respectful, engaging discussion on real life. I came here to get work done before my wife’s grandmothers funeral, and (something about this has positively impacted my day).

That’s what I love about this group. We know we don’t have all the answers, but find connection and community as we strive to use God’s/Jesus’ Light to help us take a step towards being better men, fathers, sons, friends, coworkers, people. You are Shining His Light.

Bulletproof

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WhiteFlag discussed gun violence on Tuesday, August 8, 2019. We ended with a letter my dad wrote to capture an incredible event in the workplace.

 

October  31, 2018  (Brad)

Josh had been doing very well as my replacement as sales manager at Transportation Products, Inc (TPI).  In many respects I thought he was doing a better job than I did.  He was putting to good use his 15 years of manufacturing experience at TPI and refused to sell windows that were tough to build, not hesitating to tell small customers the windows they had been buying are obsolete, and moving them into mainstream  models.  Sometimes bordered on being an ass, but sales didn’t suffer and it greatly simplified things for a young unmotivated Conecuh county Alabama workforce.

Our time together as I trained him turned us into work buddies. I knew he had a quick temper but never realized the problems he was facing.  After a year and a half into the job it culminated with an explosion in his Dad’s office….(his daddy’s office…for this is the Deep South  and that’s the vernacular used…. always sounded very immature to me, but I continually hear it from men of all ages)  Jason, the company President was in the office as well, the only voice of reason I overheard.  The explosion really elevated and I was wondering what the hell had happened.  It culminated with Josh screaming  “I quit, all I ever wanted was to feel loved” followed by threats to kill them…Josh left the building yelling and slamming everything as he hit the door.

A minute or so later his brother Brent came running into the office shouting “Josh is in his truck with a gun and shaking something awful.”

As I walked down the hall to go check on Josh, I nervously smiled to myself with a quick prayer…Lord, I’ve often joked about being bullet proof since the installation of a defibrillator in my chest, I pray that isn’t tested today.

Approaching Josh’s converted low rider pickup, he held a pistol under his chin and was shaking uncontrollably.  Not remembering all the details, I cautiously neared his truck and said something trying to soothe him.  He responded, “step back, I don’t want to get this mess all over your clothes”.  I was at a complete loss what to say, and silently asked God for guidance.  Josh mumbled, “I really fucked up this time”.  He kept repeating it while he slowly rocked in his driver’s seat, still shaking.  I objected with something like,  “Josh, I don’t know what you’re talking about, but nothing is unfixable”.  He was adamant it couldn’t be fixed.  “Josh, God loves you and it’s no problem for him to fix if you let him.”  I reached thru the open door of the truck and put my hand on his shoulder and kept saying “Jesus loves you” because I couldn’t think of anything else to say.

Still shaking he lowered his pistol somewhat, but his shaking kept it waving around.  He asked me to get his cell phone off his desk so he could call his son.  I asked for his gun but he ignored my request.  He assured me he would stay in the truck.  I went to his office and got the phone.  As I returned less than a minute later, I noticed a gun clip on the ground below the step sill of the truck.  I fumbled the exchange when handing Josh the phone, dropping it on the floor of the pickup.  As I bent down to retrieve the phone, I picked up the gun clip with my off hand and slipped it into my pocket.  Josh was still shaking violently and couldn’t press the right keys to make the call.  I was grateful not thinking it was a good idea anyway, and thankful he didn’t ask me to make the call.

With the gun clip secured in my pocket, I  was a little more bold in my movements around Josh.  When the waving of the pistol pointed in my direction I’d ask him to watch where he pointed it.  I  again put my hand on his shoulder and repeated he was going  to be alright, that I loved him and Jesus loved him.  He was sobbing.  After awhile, he seemed to calm and said he was going to leave.  I told him I couldn’t let him go with the gun.  He had another request.  His key ring was somewhere in his office and it had all his keys on it.  He couldn’t remember exactly where it was, but I told him I wouldn’t take him into the office until he gave me the pistol.  He handed me the gun and unsteadily got out of the truck.  I slipped the pistol into the back pocket of my jeans and steadied him as we walked to the office.

Thankfully, the office workers made themselves scarce, and with Josh’s office near the front door, we found the key ring and exited without confronting anyone.  Josh had calmed enough to remove his work keys from the ring and handed them to me.  He crawled back into his pickup  and  drove off painfully slow.  I kept thinking I shouldn’t have let him leave but was clueless on what to do.

The next time I saw Josh was in December in Church at a faith based rehab center.   He greeted us warmly. The center of his problems turned out to be a drug addiction few were aware of, but those closest to him suspected.   He proclaimed his salvation and appeared to be doing well.  It will be a continual struggle, and we pray he will keep Christ as his center.  At Christmas time,  Josh walked away from the rehab center, saying he couldn’t take it anymore.  While our concern grew,  I was told he got a job with the gas company in Evergreen,  got divorced, and moved in with his mother.  Continued prayers.

I haven’t thought much about that Halloween day last year, but in recounting these events,  I’m thankful to God for many things.  Only working a few days a week in semi-retirement, I’m thankful I was at work that day.  I’m so grateful to God that he kept me calm.  I’m grateful Josh couldn’t make the call to his junior high age son, because I’m afraid had he I would have so regretted getting his phone. I’m grateful he showed me instantly how to secure the gun clip without notice, wonderful fumbilitis. And I’m even grateful for my lack of knowledge of semi-automatic pistols…. Being clueless that a gun without the clip can still have a bullet in the chamber.

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