My Paternal Grandparents

Simuel Heywood Vernon, Jr., and Martha Ellen Mosley are my father’s parents.

He was known in the community as Sim Vernon and was called Sim.

Granddaddy and Grandma were married on July 27, 1919, in York County, Virginia. They celebrated sixty-nine years of marriage.

The 1920 census shows that my granddaddy, grandma, and their young son, Ed Lee, my father, lived with his parents, Simuel, Sr., and Jane, in Grafton, VA.

I am unsure if my parents, Ed Lee & Lucille, lived with Daddy’s grandparents or Momma’s parents when they first married. I had heard that my father did not go with his parents when they moved to their home on Rt 17 in Grafton, VA.; his grandmother raised him.

Sim and Martha had six children: Edward Lee (known as) Ed Lee & Bubba, Mae Ellen, Carrie Elizabeth, Alice Marie, William Haywood, and Wardell Nathanial. (See Chapter 4 for my relationship with my father’s siblings.)

Granddaddy lived in Grafton, Virginia, all his life. He worked at the Naval Mine Depot, now known as the Naval Weapons Station.

He received a certificate certifying that the U.S. Navy employed him during World War II.

Cornelia Mae Vernon is Granddaddy’s only sibling; she married Paul Francis. They lived in  Hampton, Virginia, and had 11 children; she died on July 23, 1967.

In 2010, there was a Vernon-Smith family reunion in which many members of the Francis family participated. We all met and talked to several of our cousins. My siblings and I didn’t grow up knowing them, my father’s cousins.

Granddaddy was born on August 26, 1899, in Grafton, Virginia. He was widely known and respected in the Grafton, Yorktown area. He was a faithful member of Grafton Baptist Church. He had a good life and passed away at his home in Grafton on January 16, 1988, at 89.

Martha Ellen Mosley Vernon, My Grandmother

Grandma Martha was born On February 2, 1902, in Grafton, Virginia.

My sister Barbara and I used to take the bus downtown on Saturdays to meet Grandma and Granddaddy on 25th and Jefferson Ave in the Black shopping area. Granddaddy would give each of us a dollar, which was a lot of money back then. I remember Grandma’s big smile and laugh when we did come around.

Barbara also stayed with them one or two times during the summer; she would work at the crab factory, where Grandma worked to earn money for school clothes. I tried working at the Crab factory; I worked one day but was not too fond of the smell, so I never returned.

We didn’t have a close relationship with our father’s parents when we were children. As my sisters, Jr. and I grew older and went about our lives, we all seemed to gravitate toward Grandma, and she appeared to want the relationship. She seemed glad to see us whenever there was a significant family activity. I always came by to see her whenever I came home for a visit after I married Howard and moved to Alaska.

Now that I am older, I wish I had had more time with Grandma Martha when I was young. Although I remember her and can see her face, I didn’t know her. I wish I could say, “My grandma told me.” Knowing what she liked or disliked would have been great. I would like to know if I am like her right now.

It would have meant the world to us if Grandma had made a small effort to help us after Momma passed away. At that time, we really needed her.

I am writing this book because I want my grandchildren to know me. To know that I love them and will always be there for them as long as I live.

Grandma died on March 6, 1996, at her home at 7908 George Washington Memorial Hwy Yorktown, VA 23692, at 94.

Grandma and Granddaddy are buried at Grafton Baptist Church Cemetery Harrison Grove.

THE GRANDPARENT EFFECT

Children who live with or have frequent contact with a grandparent have lower mortality and disease rates. The Grandparent stays more engaged and active and thus is more likely to live longer.

5 Things Grandparents Do for Young Children.

Grandparents can play many essential roles in the lives of their beloved grandchildren. Depending on how far away they live and other circumstances, they can be caregivers, teachers, and playmates. They are trusted advisors for their adult children, who are now parents themselves. For many families, grandparents provide regular childcare. In some cases, they are primary caregivers to their grandkids. Whether they live nearby or stay in touch from afar, the love and emotional closeness that grandparents provide significantly impact their grandchild’s healthy development.

  1. Grandparents give advice.

Being the parent of a baby or toddler is a joy, but it’s not always easy, especially for new parents. And little ones grow and develop so fast that parenting routines that work one day may not work the next. When in doubt, parents often go online for answers. But the sources of parenting information they trust the most are their own parents (usually their mothers or mothers-in-law) more than friends, pediatricians, or websites.

2. Grandparents’ lived experience and wisdom can be beneficial and calm parental frustration or panic.

Of course, some advice from grandma or grandpa may not align with what we now know about child development. Grandparents know that there’s no such thing as a perfect parent. Whether or not you can spoil a baby, their intuition and long-term perspective can be comforting to a parent who isn’t sure what to do sometimes and doesn’t want to make mistakes.

2. Grandparents teach young children.

Grandparents can bring a special enthusiasm to the time they spend with their little ones, and that helps a child learn and grow. They help children learn by playing, talking, and reading together while giving them focused attention. And they teach more directly by telling stories and sharing family and cultural traditions. Grandparents are also uniquely positioned to reinforce limits and lessons from parents while also listening, wiping away tears, and showing their grandchild that they understand.

It’s hard to quantify the impact of the special connection between young kids and their grandparents. Still, studies have shown that having actively-involved grandparents can help children grow confidence, cope with stress, and have fewer behavioral issues as they age.

3. Grandparents provide child care.

More than just occasional help, many families rely on grandparents for regular, trusted child care for their little ones. According to ZERO TO THREE, one in four children under five is looked after by their grandparents while their parents work or attend school. That’s the same number of children enrolled in formal childcare programs.

While many grandparents rise to the challenge, it’s not always easy. About half of the grandparents surveyed feel some level of disagreement or tension about approaches to childcare, and 2 out of 5 say the caregiving job is tiring.

 

  1. Some Grandparents are Primary Caregivers.

Many grandparents are also helping raise their grandchildren, which increases both the challenges and the rewards.

  1. Grandparents Love.

Babies, toddlers, and preschoolers learn and grow through close, caring relationships with adults. The most important thing that grandparents bring their little ones is love. The attention, interaction, and unconditional love from grandparents (and parents) help a young child feel safe and secure. And that’s what they need for healthy brain development.

So, a grandparent’s love makes a real, lasting impact on a young child’s future. Research also shows that a close, involved relationship is good for grandparents, too, contributing to healthier, happier, and possibly even longer lives. August 31, 2022, First Things First

After reading this, I am even more confident that my close relationship with you all, from infants to adults, was one of my biggest blessings. And we have a fantastic relationship.

Proverbs 22:6 NIV

Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old, they will not turn from it.

“To God Be the Glory.”