“Nobody is going to do your life for you. Whether you’re rich or poor, you must do it yourself, out of money or raking it in. The Beneficiary of ridiculous fortune or terrible injustice. And you must do it no matter what is true. No matter what is hard. No matter what is unjust and sucky, things have befallen you. Self-pity is a dead-end road. You Choose to drive down it. It’s up to you to decide to stay parked there or to turn around and drive out,” Cheryl Strayed
Lonnie, Sr was a joyful person; he always had a slight smile. He could be the life of the party, or he could show his temper. However, we did not go to many parties. We hung out, just the two of us, when we were not working because there were always so many people around at work.
Lonnie had one sister and six brothers, and I had one brother and six sisters. We often joked about that and how having sisters versus brothers impacted me and him and his six brothers.
He liked waiting tables, it was fast money, and he enjoyed people. I was never one to jump in or be first, so I just watched from a distance. I did not pay too much attention to him at first. Soon, I could tell that he was interested.
I was working at Dow Chemical when Lonnie and I met. I started waiting tables in Williamsburg, VA, to earn extra money to get my own place. I was staying with Aunt Mamie at the time in Lee Hall, so it was not that far away. Williamsburg is a trendy tourist city that is bustling during the summer. A server could get as many hours as you wanted, and the money was fast, tips every night. We worked in the dining room at the Hospitality House, one of the best Hotels in Williamsburg. We always got the same shift during the week, and when we worked the large banquets, we enjoyed working together. It was fun working with him, and soon I found myself talking to him more and more. We started going out after shift on the weekends when Aunt Mae babysat Karen. He worked days and nights, and I only worked on the weekends, Friday through Sunday, because it was a second job for me.
Lonnie came into my personal life very slowly, very quietly. Since I lived in Denbigh and he lived in Williamsburg, not too far apart but not close enough to pass by unintentionally. And I had a pre-teenage daughter.
Since we worked together, I was used to seeing and feeling like I knew him. He was shorter than most of the guys I dated. He was very friendly, and I was beginning to like him. He was always joking around. Sometimes I also worked as a cocktail server in the lounge. Lonnie would request to be the Bartender because sometimes the customers, primarily white men, could get out of line with the female servers after a few drinks. And Lonnie was not having any of that with me, and he would let the customer know.
We had talked about his son Troy soon after we met; he was very young. He did not talk about his relationship with Troy’s mother other than to say they only saw each other where his son was concerned. He was very protective of his son and wanted the best for him. As far as I knew, Lonnie loved Troy very much, spent time with him, and financially cared for him.
After work, our time together became more frequent, and he started coming to see me when we were off work. One night he said that he was falling in love with me. He was so cute with a big smile, and I said I love you too. I don’t think either of us was thinking long-term… well. Let me rephrase that I was not thinking long-term. Neither of us knew we would get married, have a baby, and buy a house and a new car in less than two years. Well, we did, and on October 16, 1976, we were married, and on February 2, 1978, Lonnie Jr weighed in at 10 lbs.
We had a small wedding with family and close friends. I had not planned a large wedding, I had not planned a wedding at all, but it turned into one. We got married at Aunt Mae’s house on Taliaferro’s Rd. Aunt Mae was so happy for me, and she Aunt Alice, and Aunt Carrie, did an excellent job decorating and doing the food.
Our siblings and their spouses were over thirty people between Lonnie and me. That was a very happy unforgettable day for us.
Sixteen months later, here comes Lonnie Jr. I remember telling Maxine and Beverly that I thought I was pregnant; they could not believe it. Karen was 15, and I was almost 35. And doctors told me that I could not get pregnant. But God had other plans, and Lonnie Jr. was meant to be here. My pregnancy with Lonnie Jr. was beautiful, with no problems at all. I just got bigger and bigger.
Lonnie Jr. was a wonderful surprise, baby. He was also a big baby; he weighed in at 10 lbs. I had to have a C-section. I did not think I would have any more children. Karen was 15 years old, so he had two Mommies between us. Karen was a wonderful big sister. She helped take care of him, and one of us was always holding him.
Lonnie, Sr. was thrilled; he was so into Lonnie Jr., which surprised me. I didn’t think he would be such a hands-on Dad. Lonnie would hold him and play with him. He fed him, and when Lonnie Jr was asleep in the little carrier, he would sit next to him and look at him. I could leave, and he was OK with being alone with Lonnie Jr; back then, most dads didn’t want to be left alone with a new baby. Lonnie Jr was a blessing, and all my family and friends were so happy for us. I only had six weeks of maternity leave. I did not want to return to work, but I had to. My friend Anna, who had a baby about two months before I had Lonnie and was going to stay home with her baby, offered to keep him for me. That was a blessing; she only lived a few blocks from us.
After we married, Lonnie stopped gambling and became friends with one of my classmates Robert Hunt who lived nearby. Robert was a supervisor at the Shipyard and helped him get hired there. We purchased an all brick, one-story, four-bedroom, 2 ½ bath home at 134 Harrington Rd. in the Runnymede community in Denbigh. It was not too far from where we lived in the apartment on Motoka Dr, but Karen had to change schools. His mother, Maggie, came up when we moved into the house. It was a gorgeous house, and we were thrilled at the time.
Lonnie fell in love with a car he passed every day on the way to work. He loved that car and kept talking about it. Finally, I went with him to look at it. It was a red and white 1978 Thunderbird. It was a beautiful car. I could see why he liked it so much. So, we bought it; he was so happy; I had never seen a smile like that on him.
When Lonnie and I married, I worked at Dow Badische Company in Williamsburg, Virginia. I worked in the warehouse with Maxine and Beverly in shipping and receiving. I took this job because it was straight days; otherwise, I would still be on the swing shift, rotating two weeks on days, two weeks on mid-day, and two weeks on the night shift. I was working on the machines with the WEB. Working in the warehouse was a bit harder than working the machines. There was a lot of dust, and I had to clean out a large filter where all the fiber went daily. It was not a clean job, and we got pretty dirty. We also did the shipping and receiving, which meant I had to drive a forklift. I did that the whole time I was pregnant with Lonnie, Jr. until I went on maternity leave. I had gotten so big my supervisor asked me when I would take my leave.
I knew that Lonnie gambled playing cards before we married. I never thought it was an issue, just something he did with friends after work. Working as a server in Williamsburg, nobody went home after work except me because I had another job.
The Friday night before he went to Williamsburg, Lonnie told me he wanted to hang out with some old friends and people who used to work with him. So, I didn’t overthink it; it crossed my mind that he might gamble, but when he got paid from the Shipyard, I got the check, and we did the household things we needed to do. So he went out, had some cash, gambled, and things went very wrong. There are different stories of what happened, but I will not repeat them here. We all know the result.
Lonnie Allen Williams, Sr., 34, 134 Harrington Road, Newport News, ‘died Sunday in Riverside Hospital due to gunshot wounds. A native of Fairhope, Ala., a Peninsula resident for 12 years, was employed by Newport News Shipbuilding. He was a member of Christian Valley Baptist Church in Fairhope, Alabama.
Survivors include his widow, Mrs. Martha Jane Williams; a stepdaughter, Miss Karen Vernon, and son Lonnie A. Williams Jr of the home; Troy Howard, son of Williamsburg.
His mother and stepfather, Herbert and Maggie Williams of Fairhope. His father and stepmother, Herzoll and Dorothy Williams of Fairhope; a sister, Mrs. Thelma Thomas of Alexandria and six brothers, Lionel Williams of Forestville, Md. Herbert Williams of Alexandria, Lavernon Williams of Los Angeles, Calif., Larry, and Leonard Williams, both of Fairhope and Wilbert Paul Williams of Mobile, Ala.
The Rev. Edlow of Newport News will conduct a funeral at 2 p.m. Wednesday at Whiting Funeral Home, Williamsburg. “‘Burial will be in Fairhope, Alabama, Twin Beach Cemetery. Family and friends will assemble at the residence, 134 Harrington Rd., by 1 p.m. Wednesday.
Daily Press, Newport News, Virginia, November 7, 1978, Tue.
In the early morning hours on Sunday, November, I received a call that Lonnie had been shot and taken to the hospital in Williamsburg. I was blessed to have friends that I could call. My High School classmate Robert Hunt, who had helped Lonnie get into the Shipyard, came and drove me to Williamsburg. I left Karen at home with Lonnie Jr. I remember I called someone to come and be with her. Right now, I can’t remember who.
My friends were there, Maxine, Beverly, LoLo, and Anna, we all were very close. I remember talking to Maxine more than anyone else. She was there for me the whole time. Also, my sisters Christine and Barbara were at the hospital until the end.
Troy, like Lonnie, grew up to be a wonderful young man. After Lonnie’s death, I had no contact with Troy or his mother, and I never met her.
Over the years, I have seen Tory a few times. I know he and Lonnie keep in touch, and I am so happy about that. I did make sure Troy got everything that was due to him when his father died.
“Love is cute when it’s new, but love is most beautiful when it lasts.” Lonnie Sr. and I were on our way to our forever after. We could have worked too beautiful if we had, had more time.
What does it mean to trust God’s faithfulness, and what does it look like to live out our trust in Him?
There was so much going on in my life. I did not know what to do. I had made many choices that did not come out as planned. The following is my testimony well over 40 years later.
I had just lost my husband, and he did not die from natural causes; he died of a gunshot wound at age 34. We had been married right at two years. We had purchased a new home, bought a brand-new car, and had a beautiful baby boy.
I also had a teenage daughter. I remember praying that night. I could hardly breathe. The only thing that came out of my mouth was, What? Lord, What, What am I going to do now? I have these two children, and I raised Karen without her father. But this little boy. What will I do with him without his father, without a man in his life?
God works wonders and sends the Baby lover of all time to us. Here comes Howard Harrell, My Boaz, my redeemer, has arrived. Lonnie Jr. was only nine months old when his father died, he looked for him every day, and whenever he was around a man, he would always reach for them to pick him up. It is 1980, Lonnie Jr is 16 months old, he and Howard bonded the day they met, and the bond is unbelievably strong 43 years later.
THE BEND IN THE ROAD
“Sometimes we come to life’s crossroads
And view what we think is the end.
But God has a much wider vision
And he knows that it’s only a bend—
The road will go on and get smoother
And after we’ve stopped for a rest,
The path that lies hidden beyond us
Is often the part that is best.
So rest and relax and grow stronger,
Let go and let God share your load,
And have faith in a brighter tomorrow—
You’ve just come to a bend in the road.”
Helen Steiner Rice
