Jayme, Tori and I moved to Whitewater when Tori was about two, and Alex was on the way. We purchased a terrific, 100 year old two story home across the street from the grade school and next to the city baseball diamonds. We were the second owners. Jean Joseph grew up in that house with her mom and three sisters. It had some terrific oak woodwork. We updated by adding central air and heat, updating the electrical and the plumbing, in addition to painting and a lot of wall paper. Thanks to my experience on Dad’s rentals, and some help from Grandpa and Jim Ledgerwood, we did a lot of it ourselves.
By the time Alex was old enough to run, he, Tori and I would head over to the ball diamonds. I would pitch, they would hit and take off running. Jayme would either join us, enjoy the view, or just enjoy the break. Bogie, the greatest dog in America, would normally help field. The kids were adorable, and it was a lot of fun.
Tori joined a T-ball team when she was old enough – in Whitewater, at that time, that would mean she was around six. The first year was a little rough. It was only t-ball, but we got creamed by everybody. It shouldn’t matter, but it was a little hard for me to watch.
So, the next year, I offered to coach. I got a couple of the parents to help, and we made sure the kids knew enough to be competitive and enjoy the game. T-ball remains the greatest American sport, and you could still see the occasional outfielder playing in the dirt or batter taking off running to third.
We moved to Minneapolis the summer before Tori’s third grade year, and Alex’s kindergarten year. Alex’s first T-ball team had several coaches. One was Steve Lee, a local attorney who had lost his sight several years earlier. Steve monitored the lineup in braille. Kevin Blocklinger’s barber shop sponsored the team. So when it was time for Alex’s first haircut in Minneapolis, we recommended he try Kevin out. Alex was not having any part of it. He simply refused. This was pretty out of character for our little guy, so we pressed him on why he wouldn’t want to get his hair cut by the guy who was nice enough to sponsor his T-ball team. Finally, Alex gave his explanation and we realized he confused Steve with Kevin. “Mom,” he said. “I can’t get my hair cut there. The barber is BLIND!” For years afterward, whenever Alex would get his haircut, Kevin would act like he couldn’t see, wave his arms around and say “Alex, where are you? Hold still, and come over here so I can cut your hair.”
Before long, I was coaching Alex’s baseball, basketball and football teams, and Tori’s basketball teams. Youth sports had become what scouting had been for Bob, Bill and Mom. It was a way for parents to spend time with their kids in a group environment, learning skills and habits that would benefit them for life.
Tori started playing basketball in third or fourth grade in Minneapolis. Practices were once or twice a week at the Minneapolis Grade School gym, so it kept us busy getting homework done, dinner served, and off to practice. Games were on weekends in Salina or in other towns in the area. As they progressed, the girls’ team got pretty good on a regional level. And it was a terrific group of kids. They encouraged and supported each other. They worked really hard. They had a lot of fun. By the time the girls entered junior high, they had become pretty successful against all the other small town teams in the area. After the junior high basketball season, we would form teams of 2-3 kids from different towns in the area. It was a great way to expand our circle of friends and Alex met some cool older kids to hang around with.
Alex’s friends all seemed to be about the same size, and fast. That made coaching most sports fun. They did well in YMCA football. They were competitive in baseball. In basketball, their skills and speed made them really tough. By the time they got to junior high, I found myself frequently saying, “That was a pretty good team you guys just beat by 30.” These kids stuck together, and made it to the 3A State Championship game Alex’s senior year. I was really proud of him, because of his effort. He didn’t start his junior year, but he and Trevor Adkins were the most supportive bench guys in the history of the game. His senior year, he started at the four position (large forward), even though he was only 5’11” or so. His effort and hustle were contagious. I was travelling back and forth from my new job in Michigan at the time, so I asked the local video crew to record the games for me. I ended up with a set of CD’s that Grandpa, Grandma and us have watched several times. I don’t know that we ever saw Alex not block out for a rebound. The undersized kid made All-League in both basketball (as a large forward) and football (as a defensive lineman).
The time spent coaching the kids and their friends in sports was really special to me. I got to bond with two special young people, and know where they were, what they were doing, and who they were with in the formative years. And we had a whole lot of fun.
It’s funny, but one thing that sticks with the kids from this time in their lives is when I would tell them while shooting in basketball “Don’t leave it short. Give your shot a chance by making sure you get it there. If it’s off a little to the right or left, you can fix that later.” My coaching style is similar to my parenting style, I’m more of an encourager than a disciplinarian. I hope that Tori and Alex carry this lesson to their lives as well – don’t leave it short. Give life all you have. Have a lot of fun. Work hard. Enjoy your family and your friends. Hug everybody. If you’re off a little to the right or the left, you can correct that later – but in the meantime, give life all you’ve got and don’t leave it short.
