In my 5th grade Social Studies class, Mrs. Mueller decided to immerse the class into understanding the American political process as a class project. She divided our class into two groups that she labeled ‘Conservatives’ and ‘Liberals’, and I’m convinced none of us knew the meaning behind either label. Upon first glance, I instantly found myself excited for the classmates and friends in my group, including my very best friend, Colton Walle. Each group was instructed to work within the ’party’ to identify a presidential nominee, and I was selected to represent the party. Mrs. Mueller then said that the nominee was to name a running mate for the upcoming mock election that would encompass the entire 5th grade. The conservatives identified Georgie Porter as the nominee and he chose Jes Condray to join him. I remember having very little time to make a decision among the approximately 12 people in my party, and it was a no-brained to choose Colton…however, at the last minute I changed my mind and selected Erin Willoughby, in hopes of securing the female votes in the election.
That decision paid off, as I remember the victory as 59-3 in our favor. The very next recess, I remember riding the political high from the secured victory and I approached my vice presidential running mate with a wave of nerves near the basketball court, and I ultimately asked her ‘Will you go with me?” This was a significant moment in my life. THE FIRST TIME I built up courage to ask a girl in person! Until this moment, the practice I was most comfortable with was passing notes/circling yes-no….But I had done it. Asked the question. Only to realize that I didn’t get an answer as quickly as I was expecting. The delay seemed to be an eternity, but realizing the weight of what I had just done, I saved myself AND Erin by saying ‘Don’t worry about it’, retracting my offer before the inevitable rejection that would have followed.
Just 4 years later, as my family was moving from Brentwood, Tennessee to Brenton, Alabama, my parents — presumably due to a level of guilt for moving our family once more — allowed Ty and I to attend the last 6 weeks of school in Minneapolis, Kansas, and live with my grandparents Ken and Darda. It did not take me long to reconnect with Colton, and I remember specifically asking him what the girl landscape was at the high school. He told me he knew one girl liked me, but I was more interested in Erin.
We spent some time together in groups of friends, including several ping-pong matches with Jes Condray and Angie Rupert. But I do remember one occasion where several of us played some version of hide and seek on the golf course at dark. My crush continued. It took 5 years later for the story to continue.
In November of 1996 my roommate, Corey, told me someone left a message. He said ‘Aaron called’. That’s how I heard it anyway. When I saw he had listed a 913 area code, I knew…Erin! I called her back and we spent some time catching up, and I learned that Erin asked my grandma, Darda, how I was doing and grandma told her to call me and find out, giving her my number. Erin and I exchanged e-mail addresses and continued to stay in touch over the next few months. In March, I decided it was time to “visit my grandma” back in Kansas over spring break instead of all my other options afforded me.
Erin turned down an opportunity to go to Colorado that week
**drove/stopped in Manhattan, went out to eat….assume I stayed with Colton??
**Only saw each other essentially 2-3 days of the week. Also suffered worst loss in KU history (to Arizona) https://www.sports-reference.com/cbb/boxscores/1997-03-21-arizona.html
The night before I left back to Bama / first kiss —
Neither of us address whether or not we were dating, but definitely continued to deepen our friendship as I was grateful to establish an opportunity to work for my uncle Mike in Salina later that summer.
**after the summer, went back to work again in Salina during the 6 week break I had between Thanksgiving and New Years. That’s probably the time we both knew.
For Spring Break in 1998, I flew Erin down and picked her up in Atlanta, and we ??drove to Troy briefly? and then to Brewton. The next day (Saturday, March 21, 1998) we drove to Ft. Walton/Destin Florida. I lead Erin towards a walk on the beach as sunset approached, on Ft. Walton Public Beach Access #5…the scenery was beautiful. We walked along the beach holding hands through the refreshing gulf breeze, watching seagulls pass by.
I cannot remember the words I began to ramble, but the spirit of what I told Erin is that she had injected supreme joy in my life over the previous year, and that I had never been happier. My best friend, and someone I was ready to spend the rest of my life with. At that point I got down with one knee in the sand, opened a jewelry case exposing a diamond ring, and said “Erin Willoughby, will you marry me?”
It was a complete surprise to Erin, and she froze in shock. I had spent the past 3 months thinking about and preparing for this moment, and she was absorbing it all in about 10 seconds of being speechless. Surely, as I was waiting, many of those same feelings as a 5th grader afraid of rejection came flowing back to consciousness. But there was no retraction this time, the wait felt like an eternity. Erin collected herself and said ‘Yes’ and we hugged and kissed in joy. Erin was awestruck processing the situation as two 20 year olds committed the rest of their lives to one another. For the next several hours I remember Erin staring at her ring in shock. We went out to eat at a steakhouse nearby to celebrate, but couldn’t even purchase a drink!
Earlier that week, I called Randy and Linda to let them know my intentions of asking Erin to marry me. I know I worked myself up over this in anticipation of speaking to them because it felt like it was on the very early side of possibilities, and mostly impossibility, at that point in our relationship. I remember I started with everyday chit chat, which was certainly odd over the phone while I was at school, and then worked myself into several compliments about Erin. When I finally spit it out that I had planned to ask Erin to marry me, Randy’s first comment was “Well, we’ve been expecting this for a while now.” That totally shocked me!
I was certainly excited about what was in store for us next. This was March, 1998, and I remember making a push to get married in August. In my mind I was already prepared to transfer to whatever city Erin would be attending Occupational Therapy School (Wichita or Kansas City). After I was awakened to all of the planning to be done, June 12, 1999, sure sounded like a strong date.
Of course I had already registered for Troy State Spring Quarter classes with an intent on transferring, so I had the scholarship minimum 12 hours of classes — one of them a repeat of a C I planned to bring up to an A, and an easy Art class. I met with my counselor before the add/drop class date and realized that instead of transferring at the end of my sophomore year, I could load up and tackle the remaining classes I needed to graduate just 8 months later. He approved my taking 20 hours in the spring, 20 hours in the summer, and 22 hours in the fall of 1998. I graduated before Thanksgiving, and had a job lined up at the US District Court in Kansas City, Kansas, as a Systems Engineer ($32,000).
**never charged my phone bill until 2 weeks left/etc
